Streams in the desert

Sometimes out on village trips, I find I struggle more with spending daily time with the Lord. I’m sort of addicted to quiet mornings by myself with my Bible and my coffee, and so, for better or for worse, when this routine is interrupted I often have a hard time focusing.

When I went to the forest in November, I was really in need of some time with Him, but just couldn’t seem to find a private place without distractions. One morning I went to eat breakfast with Pastor Jonoro and Robine, my friend who went with me. I was feeling frustrated, knowing that the day was starting and just wishing I had had more time to read.

As we ate, Pastor Jonoro began talking about some of the lessons that were rising to the surface of our discussions of the stories with the groups. We had been learning stories from the life of David. In the first story, God promises David that his descendants will inherit his kingdom. God also promises that He will never take His love from them, but that He will correct them when they stray. Then we looked at the story of David and Bathsheba, and Nathan’s confrontation of David’s sin. Pastor Jonoro talked about times in his life when he could see that the Lord allowed him to go his own way, even into sin, but that in retrospect he could see how the Lord had corrected him, and brought him back on track in love. The pastor was explaining that in his life, God’s love is not necessarily shown in never letting him make mistakes or fall into problems, even problems of his own making, but rather in God’s presence in those problems, and salvation from them, through them.

As he spoke, I had tears running down my face. I’m sure you’re all tired of reading about how much I try to be perfect, and fail, and about how God’s grace in these failures, and repeated assurances of the fact that perfection isn’t even the goal, are what often make me love Him most . . . but there it is. The sweetest part of hearing from Pastor Jonoro was that I knew the Lord was using him to speak truth into my heart, even though I hadn’t had time to read, I wasn’t alone with my coffee in my house—the Lord wanted to meet with me, and did, right there! I'm deeply thankful for the community of believers He’s given me here, and how He uses that community, and all circumstances, to teach me and guide me and make His presence known to me! Even if I’m in the “desert”, or the middle of the Masikoro forest with no time and no privacy, He can send me streams of living water to transform and refresh my heart!  

Forest Trips

The last two trips to the forest have been very encouraging! As always, I’m amazed and blessed to watch the Lord grow the group and use them to accomplish His good works! On the first trip in November, we actually crafted three stories in three days—this is great progress! We had several new people in the group also, which makes me excited to see the group continue to grow in the future.

In the story-crafting, our goal is to craft Bible stories that are truly in the dialects, born out of the minds and hearts and good understanding of the believers in the groups. In this way, the stories will be more clear and accessible to other dialect-speakers hearing them for the first time. As we worked on the first story during the November trip, I told it a couple of times first, as I usually do. It became clear that some of the new people in the group weren’t understanding very well, so Brigitta, an older woman in the group, came up with a plan. She said, “Tessa, I think it’s better if after you tell it, we retell it in our own words to help our new friends understand it better.” I was thrilled! She basically summed up our entire story-crafting goal in this one sentence! How exciting for the group to see the need for the work they’re doing, and also to see the results in their own community!

Then on the December trip, Pastor Jonoro and I were able to watch as the group members shared an overarching story spanning from creation to the resurrection of Jesus with a group of non-believers from deep in the forest. The story was clear, and our group did a great job leading the others in discussing it, and gleaning scriptural truths from it. Join us in praying for wisdom for our group as they seek how to continue their work with this new group. Pray for this deeper forest group of non-believers, as well, that the Lord would continue to open their eyes and hearts to truths from His Word. 

The Holidays: Hot, Cold, Fun-Filled and Special

In the last few years, I’ve realized that not everyone in the world associates Christmas with cold weather, scarves, hot chocolate, and snow . . . but for me, these aspects are still inextricably linked with the overall feeling of Christmastime. So, as Christmas approached in Madagascar, the usual dilemma presented itself—with temperatures climbing into the hundreds, and my wardrobe consisting purely of tank tops and flip-flops, “It just doesn’t feel like Christmas!”

But it is Christmas, and starting with Thanksgiving, the Lord has blessed me this year with some precious times with friends, family, and loved ones. The six short-term personnel on our team celebrated Thanksgiving together this year, complete with turkey, dressing, biscuits and Spanikopita! We also took a beach day trip—might as well celebrate the heat! J

Then, I was able to visit my family for a few days in Paris—I am so thankful to have been able to see them at Christmas! And, I got my fill of cold weather for the year! I spent the whole trip bundled up in my sister’s clothes J On our last night there, we went to a Christmas Eve Mass at Notre Dame. Though unlike any Christmas Eve service I’ve ever been to, being in the beautiful cathedral and listening to worship music in French and Latin, I was struck with the ageless message of grace that Jesus’ birth brought to all of us. He is indeed the Savior of the World . . . and His death and resurrection are what makes our individual relationships with Him possible! How truly glorious is the salvation He wrought!

But my holidays aren’t over! This morning I got to have Christmas breakfast with my teammates here in Tulear, and enjoy a Christmas movie! And depending on what’s been going on at my Malagasy church while I’ve been gone (they’ve been working on building a new building!), there may be a few more Christmas, or at least New Years, celebrations yet to come! I feel so blessed to be able to spend time with so many people I love this season, and to remember that it is only His love and grace that makes all these relationships possible! 

Four Years!

This month marks four years from the time I first moved to Madagascar. I can’t believe it’s been that long! I know that God has truly changed my life forever through what He’s allowed me to experience here.

He has blessed me abundantly in relationships here. He’s given me Malagasy friends who have taught me about language, culture, life, and His nature. He’s also given me a mission family who constantly inspire me to be more like Him through their love and example.

He has blessed me with experiences I could never have imagined . . . some painful, some hilarious, some deeply fulfilling—all meaningful.

He’s given me new skills! I never thought I could learn to drive stick-shift, or cook, or throw out old water without it splashing back on me, or sing in another language, or drive a moped, or jump into a moving car . . .

He’s shown me all I’m not. It seems that with every new piece of language or cultural information I may discover, I’m stunned to realize how much more exists to be learned! It seems that with each victory, and each failure, what shows most clearly is what I’m lacking. But the very best part is that all that I’m not, He Is. He has been so, so faithful to me. When I have been weak, or happy, or afraid, or excited, or bewildered, or surprised, or faithless—He has been with me; He has been Himself!

He is Himself—His huge, beautiful, active, glorious Self! Somehow, in the depths of His grace, He chose to take me on this journey with Him. He chose to let me see that His is, and has been, active on an island the size of Texas in the middle of the Indian Ocean from the beginning, and that He has set eternity in the hearts of people here.

When I moved here, I wondered if I would one day love Madagascar. By His grace, I do—I love this place, and these people. But my love is selfish, impure, and is as nothing to His! His loving, pursuing activity in the lives of people, families, villages here takes my breath away. And somehow He’s let me be a part of this activity!

When I first arrived here, I had no idea what my time here would come to mean to me. Even now, I can’t see the full picture of what God is doing, either in my life or in the lives of people here. I’ve been thinking about a line C. S. Lewis wrote in Out of the Silent Planet:

“A pleasure is full grown only when it is remembered. You are speaking, [man], as if the pleasure were one thing and the memory another. It is all one thing . . . What you call remembering is the last part of the pleasure . . . When you and I met, the meeting was over very shortly, it was nothing. Now it is growing something as we remember it. But still we know very little about it. What it will be when I remember it as I lie down to die, what it makes in me all my days till then—that is the real meeting. The other is only the beginning of it.”

When I think about Madagascar, I “still know very little about it”. I still know very little, too, about what God is doing here, and what He’s doing in my life through my time here. But I truly believe that this place and these relationships will “make [something] in me all my days” . . . that I’ll never be the same.

And yet, even if my life has been shifted, knocked in its course by these last few years, I am just one person. How unfathomable that He is at work like this, changing lives and redirecting histories all over the world and throughout time according to His glorious plan!

“Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!

How unsearchable his judgments,
    

and his paths beyond tracing out!

“Who has known the mind of the Lord?
    

Or who has been his counselor?”

“Who has ever given to God,
    

that God should repay them?”

For from him and through him and for him are all things.

To him be the glory forever! Amen.”

Romans 11:33-36 

Please pray for our pastor in the forest and his family!

While I was in the forest on this last trip, a believing couple there shared with me something that has been burdening their hearts lately. Aside from their immediate family, no one else in their family are believers. This man is the pastor of the church in the village, and has said, much like Joshua in the Old Testament, “as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”. Lately, his other family members have started “praying” to the ancestors against this couple because of their beliefs. The couple knows that the God we serve is more powerful than anything their family can “pray” against them. They in turn are praying that their kindness and faith, as well as God’s protection, will be a testimony to their family of the truth found only in Jesus Christ.  In a culture where family relationships are paramount, however, a situation like this can cause much stress, fear, and pain. Join me in praying for spiritual protection for this family, as well as for encouragement for them. Pray that their example will bear fruit in the lives of their family members!

new relationships

Mid-September, our beloved volunteer team from Southbridge Fellowship in Raleigh, North Carolina, came to visit and work with us here. They put on two youth events, visited an orphanage, and spent a week in three villages in the south teaching on health, leadership, lessons from the book of James, and sharing worship songs with the villagers.

Their coming was a double blessing for me, because along with seeing them and ministering alongside them, I was also able to visit the villages in the south, which I am able to visit only a few times a year. Kelli, one of the team members, is a Physician’s Assistant, and I had the privilege of going “hut-to-hut” with her, visiting women in their homes and talking about health issues they and their families face. Christina, another woman from our team, and Ando, a member of our church who helped us with translating, were also a part of these visits, and the time with them and the village women was truly precious. I learned so much during these visits—I had conversations with women about topics I have rarely discussed with American women, much less Malagasy women. Kelli’s medical expertise truly opened doors I wouldn’t have expected, and I feel honored that the women in the villages were willing to share with us some of the things they did.

 We had some particularly meaningful times with the women in the village of Andremba. There, we mostly met with the women all together, rather than one by one. They seemed to be tight-knit group, and one morning we spent time just sharing prayer requests and taking a few moments to lift each other up in prayer. I was also able to share with them some of my personal testimony, how my dad became a believer long after my mom and I did. This seemed to resonate with them, as many of them shared with us that their husbands aren’t Christians.

As I shared, though I am constantly hearing about and praying for these southern villages, I am actually only able to visit them rarely. I am so thankful that the Lord gave me this opportunity to connect more deeply with the women in all three villages—those relationships are precious, and inspire me to keep praying, and to ask you to pray as well! 

back to the forest

I was blessed to spend last weekend in the forest! It had been over two months since I was there, and I was so thankful to see everyone again!

Life in the village is so seasonal—it seemed that much had changed even in the last two months. The days are too hot and the nights too windy for outdoor fires now, so each night we would gather around the house where Nina was cooking and talk with their family. I have been so thankful over the last few visits for the opportunity to get to know Nina, the pastor’s wife in the village, better. She is a very wise woman. She was a believer before her husband, and when he shared his testimony with us, he told us how she used to “preach” the sermons she would hear at church to him on Sunday afternoons. It was through her words that God first began to call Kandre to salvation.

The first full day we were there, the story-crafting group wasn’t able to meet. Instead, we helped Tete, the schoolteacher, register the children in the village for the new school year. This way, we were able to see many families in the village we might not have seen otherwise.

I had a friend with me visiting from another African country. She’s doing a similar project there, crafting stories for shepherds, and it was such a blessing to share ideas with someone working on something similar.

On Sunday morning, we went to church in the village. As always, this was a precious time of worshipping with the believers there. The storying group met on Sunday afternoon and Monday morning. I was a little nervous at these meetings. Several of the strongest members of the group weren’t there, and there were some new people as well. I wasn’t sure how the dynamics of the group would work. I know in reality that how the times goes, even if it goes, what we get accomplished, the quality of the discussion, the group dynamics—none of those things are dependent on me, but rather on the Holy Spirit. I often forget this, though, and feel unnecessary pressure. I was praying as we progressed, asking the Lord to take this pressure away, and just to do whatever He wanted—He was free to disregard my goals and agendas, and I’d love it if He’d help me disregard them as well, and fix my eyes on Him!

The time went great! I loved watching the new people catch on to the storying process, and hearing the lessons everyone was learning from the discussion. I am always amazed with the growth of the group members, and I think having some people missing during this sessions caused others to step forward who hadn’t yet taken leadership roles.

We were working on the story where God chooses David to be king, and in the story is that famous line: “People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” Maybe it’s a stretch, but I think this proved true even about this trip. I was looking at the outward realities: some key people couldn’t meet, we didn’t have as much meeting time as I had hoped, I was nervous and uncertain. In the meantime, the Lord was looking at the hearts of the group, and was ready to bless them with life-changing lessons from His Word! Praise Him that He did this!